Monthly Meeting Minutes - 16th May 2019

The Shingle of Southsea Holmesian Society

Monthly Meeting Minutes

Date of Meeting: 16^th May 2019

Location of Meeting:

The Sherloft, My House, Portsmouth, UK

Attendees:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller)

Apologies:

Invisible Tony apologised and was ejected from The Sherloft.

Presentation:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) presented his fascinating findings about beards in the canon:

Beards

By Paul Thomas Miller

There are 96 uses of the word "beard" in The Canon. A study of them can prove most illuminating. I conducted some research and discovered how the beards are distributed across the stories. Of course, we should expect some bias in the long stories compared to the short stories. The more words there are, the more chance there is that one of those words will be "beard". Therefore, a simple tally means very little. More interesting is the rate of beards per ten-thousand words.

Story	Number of Beards	Rate of Beards per 10K Words
A Study In Scarlet	5	1.15
The Sign of the Four	6	1.39
A Scandal in Bohemia	0	0.00
The Red-Headed League	0	0.00
A Case of Identity	0	0.00
The Boscombe Valley Mystery	1	1.04
The Five Orange Pips	0	0.00
The Man with the Twisted Lip	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Blue Carbuncle	1	1.28
The Adventure of the Speckled Band	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Engineer's Thumb	1	1.21
The Adventure of the Noble Bachelor	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Beryl Coronet	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Copper Beeches	1	1.00
Silver Blaze	1	1.04
The Yellow Face	0	0.00
The Stock-Broker's Clerk	1	1.47
The “Gloria Scott”	0	0.00
The Musgrave Ritual	0	0.00
The Reigate Squires	0	0.00
The Crooked Man	0	0.00
The Resident Patient	0	0.00
The Greek Interpreter	2	2.85
The Naval Treaty	0	0.00
The Final Problem	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Cardboard Box	0	0.00
The Hound of the Baskervilles	18	3.04
The Adventure of the Empty House	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Norwood Builder	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Dancing Men	1	1.03
The Adventure of the Solitary Cyclist	10	12.74
The Adventure of the Priory School	5	4.35
The Adventure of Black Peter	5	6.15
The Adventure of Charles Augustus Milverton	1	1.49
The Adventure of the Six Napoleons	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Three Students	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Golden Pince-Nez	1	1.12
The Adventure of the Missing Three-Quarter	4	4.98
The Adventure of the Abbey Grange	2	2.18
The Adventure of the Second Stain	0	0.00
The Adventure of Wisteria Lodge	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Devil's Foot	3	3.00
The Adventure of the Red Circle	3	4.09
The Adventure of the Dying Detective	0	0.00
The Disappearance of Lady Frances Carfax	5	6.50
The Adventure of the Bruce-Partington Plans	1	0.93
The Valley Of Fear	6	1.04
His Last Bow	1	1.65
The Adventure Of The Mazarin Stone	0	0.00
The Problem of Thor Bridge	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Creeping Man	0	0.00
The Illustrious Client	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Sussex Vampire	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Three Garridebs	3	4.83
The Blanched Soldier	7	9.05
The Adventure of the Three Gables	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Lion's Mane	1	1.39
The Adventure of the Retired Colourman	0	0.00
The Adventure of the Veiled Lodger	0	0.00
The Adventure of Shoscombe Old Place	0	0.00

On their own, I think we can all agree that these figures are fascinating. But they become even more interesting when we look at the rate of beards by year. There are two types of year to consider: the year of publication and the year when the adventures took place.

By adding word counts and beard counts for each year I arrived at the following rates of beard mentions. (Where no data is given, there is no data for that year. Where a zero is given, there is data for that year but no mention of beards.)

Year	Beard Rate for Chronological Years	Beard Rate for Publication Years
1875	0
1877	0
1881	1.39
1883	0
1884	0.61
1886	0.61
1887	0.64	1.15
1888	0.93
1889	1.86
1890	0.42	1.39
1891	0.71	0.2
1892	0	0.63
1893		0.35
1894	1.73
1895	4.83
1896	0
1897	2.71
1898	1.03
1899	0
1900	0
1901	4.35	3.04
1902	2.04
1903	3.32	3.1
1904		2.34
1907	1.39
1908		0.45
1910		3
1911		5.32
1913		0
1914	1.65	1.04
1917		1.65
1921		0
1922		0
1923		0
1924		1.37
1926		3.01
1927		0

Perhaps the full impact of this information is not made clear until it is seen in graph form (click on it for a bigger version):

As you can see, peak beard rates are seen around and after 1910 in the publication dates. However, this data is skewed towards the 1890s in the dates of when the stories took place. Which is telling.

You see, beard popularity in the UK was high from 1850 to 1900 (more or less). After the turn of the century, though, beards went out of fashion. They were replaced for a time by moustaches and eventually by being clean shaven.

The chronology data reflects these trends, whereas the publication data is quite contrary.

Now, if we are to believe that the stories are fabrications of the infamous Arthur Conan Doyle, would it not be reasonable to expect his contemporary writing to reflect the contemporary facial fashions? We are told by Doyleites that he churned out the Holmes stories with nary a thought of accuracy or anachronism. How likely is it that such a man would bother to get the beards right? His characters would reflect the people around him.

But if the stories are real accounts of real events, we see a different story. Although Watson is writing the stories much later, he is writing them accurately and remembers how people looked at the time.

(Incidentally, the chronology I used when compiling this data was Watson Does Not Lie – an excellent book which will be published by Wildside Press later this year. It is by a Holmesian genius named Paul Thomas Miller.)

Any Other Business:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) suggested making use of his new Sherlock Holmes bottle-opener. All were in favour and set about the assembled beer bottles with an undignified fervour.

Monthly Meeting Minutes - 22nd April 2019

The Shingle of Southsea Holmesian Society

Monthly Meeting Minutes

Date of Meeting: 22nd April 2019

Location of Meeting:
The Sherloft, My House, Portsmouth, UK

Attendees:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller)

Apologies:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) apologised for arriving early. No one seemed bothered.

Presentation:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) presented the results of a challenge he responded to on Twitter. @EmmaGrant_01 proposed that Twittees should "type “The title of my next fic is” and let autocomplete do its thing...". "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) got "The title of my next fic is the best film ever made a pork and I have no idea who was possessed by the way home now he's a police station and I can't get child care." Which he wrote up as follows:

The "Best-Film-Ever" Made a Pork and I Have No Idea Who Was Possessed by The-Way-Home. Now He’s a Police Station and I Can’t Get Child Care.

by Paul Thomas Miller

The occult and Sherlock Holmes should never be mixed. That was my big mistake. Sure, Holmes and Watson was the best film ever. Sure, Satan and his minions like movies. But did that make it right to summon his unholy servants for a film night because I’d managed to get a pirate DVD at a car-boot sale the previous Sunday? No. No it did not.
It was fortunate that the battery was low on my Ouija Board and I only managed to summon three demons. I’d forgotten to go shopping and a tube of Pringles and some flat cola wasn’t going to satisfy many more.
I was excited to show them the film. After brief introductions my new demon friends; Demon Fourteen, Evil Lord The-Way-Home and Douglas “The Bastard” Anthrax, were keen to get down to watching the movie. So I put it on, poured us some drinks and opened the Pringles. Prawn cocktail flavour. Nevermind, they’d do.
All was going well to start with. As Watson was saved by Holmes’s giant marrow, we agreed it was the best film ever. As Moriarty was let off in court, we maintained that it was the best film ever. As Watson proclaimed his love for Queen Victoria, we were unified by the objective fact that this was the best film ever. But then things went wrong.
The flat beverage reacted violently with the demons’ bile. Of course, I should have read the warnings on the Ouija Board before I served the drinks, but hindsight is always 20-20. It was too late now. Evil Lord The-Way-Home had already started on his. With a sudden pop, he exploded, spraying evil all over the room. An especially large chunk of cranial evil hit the DVD player which immediately began ejecting a huge misshapen cut of pork from the DVD slot. My new carpet was ruined. Eggy evil was sprayed across most of it. Even if I could get that out, the pork juices looked set to colour it for good.
I ran off to the kitchen to fetch some Vanish and a damp sponge. But I hadn’t bothered to check on Fourteen and Douglas. They had been sat right next to The-Way-Home. They were covered in gibletty evil. When I returned with my cleaning supplies, I was greeted by the sight of the two remaining demons screaming double-strength evil into the air. The twisted soul of The-Way-Home leapt between them, wreaking havoc with their extra-dimensional essences. This was no good for any of us and I was forced to pause Holmes and Watson (which was still proving itself to be the best film ever made despite the noise).
I turned to my Whittaker’s Household Demon Management Manual for guidance and soon found what to do. Once armed with a bowl, three socks and a pointy stick I was ready to exorcise The-Way-Home so the rest of us might stand a chance at survival. But first I had to identify where he was. And Fourteen and Douglas were both in such a panic that it was impossible for my non-magic eyes to tell who he had possessed and who was just frightened. I paused too long.
With a shriek, Demon Fourteen turned into a bloodied 1970’s rural police station. His sudden growth in size, due to his three stories and sizable chambers, knocked Douglas “The Bastard” Anthrax so hard he was obliged to turn into a three-month old baby and the Pringles were knocked all over the already marred carpet.
Reader, I was livid. And my lividity lasts to this day. Now I am forced to share my home with a police station and a baby which vomits fart-scented demon guts wherever it pleases on an almost hourly basis. In the circumstances, I can get no child care. So I am forced to remain home watching Holmes and Watson on a loop all day every day.
Still, it is the best film ever. And I do have plenty of pork to eat. So it isn’t all bad.

Any Other Business:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) proposed a discussion of the newly formed society; Doyle's Rotary Coffin but no one else had heard of it, so we moved on to bath time.

Monthly Meeting Minutes - 1st March 2019

The Shingle of Southsea Holmesian Society

Monthly Meeting Minutes

Date of Meeting: 1^st March 2019

Location of Meeting:

The Sherloft, My House, Portsmouth, UK

Attendees:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller)

Apologies:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) apologised for the stains.

Presentation:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) presented the following pastiche:

The Adventure of the Fauversham Place

It was a mid-summer morning in Baker Street and I had just finished my toast and eggs when the boy in buttons rushed in with a telegram. Holmes was lying on the sofa on the opposite side of the room. Without opening his eyes his waved an imperious hand towards me and I was given the missive.

"Read it to me, would you Watson?" he droned as the boy rushed away again.

I did so. "Holmes. Bad business down at Fauversham. Join me as soon as able. Lestrade."

So it was that we found ourselves on the next train to Hampshire. We were met at the village station by the inspector who at once burst into a description of the situation.

"It' a bad business, Mr Holmes! A bad business."

"So you said in your telegram. I trust there is more to go on than that?"

"Of course. Three missing. Two homes vanished. One body recovered. I say "body" but "remains" would be more apt. I shall explain the full circumstances on the way to the scene."

We boarded a dog cart, and while a constable drove us Lestrade filled us in.

"We are headed to Fauversham Place, the rural estate of Mr Howard Plank. On one of his more remote fields he had three tenants. Brothers. They had each built their own homes fairly near to each other. When rent day came around he visited with the intention of collecting and found two of the houses were gone, as were all three tenants. He called in the local constable; PC Brazier, who is driving us now. On examining the remaining house he made a grisly discovery; in a cauldron above the fireplace were the bones of one of the brothers. At once he realised he was in deep water and called in Scotland Yard. I was sent down yesterday but can make nothing of it. That is why I asked for your help."

"What makes you so sure the remains are those of one of the brothers?" asked Holmes.

"Ah! Perhaps I should describe the tenants to make that much clear. The brothers, naturally, share a surname: "Littlepig". They are named First, Second and Third. The surname is rather apt, because they are actually..."

"Anthropomorphised pigs?" interrupted Holmes.

"Quite. And the remains in the cauldron were clearly those of an anthropomorphised animal. So you see, they must be the remains of one of the Littlepigs."

I must have appeared shocked for Holmes placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder and calmly explained "You see, Watson, we are in a poorly written story by Paul Thomas Miller. He clearly thought this strange mash-up would be a good idea. He often thinks such things. Fortunately, he doesn't usually follow them through."

At once I felt placated, did my best to rebuild the fourth wall and we carried on as if nothing had happened.

Lestrade took us to the sites of the first two houses. Nothing remained. It was as if the Earth had opening up and swallowed them whole. All Holmes could find was some flotsam of the sort one would expect to find on a farm; feed for animals and sticks for fuel.

We arrived at the remaining dwelling and Holmes set to work examining its exterior. He appeared to gather much from it as he crawled about picking up stray pieces of straw and old twigs. For myself, I could tell nothing other than it was a sturdy brick building of which any porcine builder would be proud.

"Are we able to see the remains?" Holmes asked.

"Certainly. We left them where they were found." said Lestrade, ushering us into the small house.

The bones were certainly animal. They were left higgledy-piggledy in the bottom of the cauldron. Here and there flesh stuck to them. Holmes probed them, and the small puddle at the bottom of the pot.

"This body has been cooked!" he ejaculated.

Then, as he pointed out the teeth marks in the meat and the stock in the bottom of the cauldron it became all too obvious that the victim had been eaten.

Lestrade was the first to vocalise our thoughts: "With this discovery, you have made it all clear! The brothers must have fallen out. Probably over money or who gets to go "wee wee wee" all the way home. A fight ensued in which two of the pigs lost their homes and lives. To destroy the evidence, Third Littlepig ate his brothers."

"An interesting theory," Holmes remarked. "But how do you explain the disappearance of Third Littlepig?"

For a moment Lestrade seemed stumped, but he quickly suggested "He was driven mad with grief or guilt and fled the scene. By now he has probably been found raving with hysteria and is locked away anonymously in some local asylum. Tracking him should present no great difficulty. I am sorry to have brought you all the way down for such a trifle, Holmes."

"We shall see." he replied with ominous eye-brow waggling. "I have one or two further enquiries to make. Shall we meet at the local tavern for dinner?"

This agreed Holmes and I set off on foot for the estate's manor house.

After knocking on the door of the house we were greeted by Howard Plank himself who ushered us into his drawing room.

"It's terrible news!" he moaned. "The Littlepigs were all such good tenants. Third especially, was a diligent chap. And he generally kept his brothers on the straight and narrow."

"Would I be right in surmising," asked Holmes "that not all the houses were as sturdily built as Third Littlepig's?"

"Quite so!" chuckled Plank. "I'm afraid neither First nor Second were as hard working as their brother. First built his of straw and Second built his out of sticks. You can imagine how they looked!"

"One more question, Mr Plank. Do you have any wolf problems around here?"

"Why, yes, one has been sighted recently. Which is strange, as they went extinct in England in the sixteenth century. Mind you, this one is said to be..."

"An anthropomorphised wolf." finished Holmes. "Thank you, Mr Plank, you have been most helpful. Come Watson, I believe I have a good chance of tracking down the elusive Third Littlepig!"

I was left at the village tavern while Holmes went off on a secret errand. It was a beautiful summer evening when he returned and Lestrade arrived soon after.

"Well Holmes?" he enquired. "Have you made anything of it?"

"I have made a good deal!" he replied as our dinner was served. "I took the liberty of ordering for all of us, by the way."

"Never mind the food," Lestrade grumbled, tucking in, "what about the case!"

"Very well. You were in error from the first, Lestrade. The bones were not those of a pig, anthropomorphised or otherwise. While superficially similar, they were in fact the bones of an anthropomorphised wolf."

"A wolf!" Lestrade protested "But they have been extinct in England since..."

"Yes, the sixteenth century. However, a certain Mr Bigbad Woolf arrived in this country from America just two months ago. Seeking the natural prey of the anthropomorphised wolf, he soon found himself in Fauversham on the trail of anthropomorphised pigs - the  

Littlepig brothers. Once located, it would be simple to devour First and Second. All he needed to do was use his lupine ability to huff, puff and blow their houses down before he gobbled them up whole."

"So they were all three eaten by Bigbad Woolf!" Lestrade interrupted.

"Not all. No. Third had sensibly built his house of brick. No amount of huffage, puffage or blowing down would provide a wolf with access. Woolf was forced to climb down the chimney. Unfortunately for him, Third was ready! He had set a cauldron of boiling water in the fireplace. No sooner had he dropped down into the house, than Woolf was boiled to death. Third, naturally for a greedy little piggy, couldn't resist easting the delicious canine stew."

"Then where did Third disappear to?" I asked.

"Simple, Watson! Having tasted canine meat, he was beguiled by its wonderful flavour. Where does one go when one wants to eat more dog meat?"

But before I could make an obvious comment about Mrs Hudson's cooking, he answered the question himself: "The dog pound! I have just returned from Fauversham dog pound where Third was busy trying to adopt all the dogs."

"Where is he now, then?"

"When I tried to stop him, he turned wild. A dog-meat-frenzy was upon him and he tried to fry several small Chihuahuas. I was forced to remove his head and entrails. The kindly chef at this magnificent tavern dealt with rest and we are now eating him in the form of these delicious chops."

We all laughed as the scene faded to black and the credits began to roll.

Any Other Business:

There was some discussion over whether or not the society should adjourn to the pub. No one could agree so we all went to bed early instead.

Monthly Meeting Minutes - 6th February 2019

At this month's meeting "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) revealed a new method of creating Holmesian pastiche. He fed The Canon through a shredder, took some pieces at random and put them together to make a new story. This was the result:

The Relations Between Us

By Arthur Conan Doyle and Paul Thomas Miller

The relations between us in those latter days were peculiar. (CREE) Holmes had spent several days in bed, as was his habit from time to time. (3GAR) Holmes looked at me thoughtfully and shook his head. (SUSS)

“Awake, Watson?” he asked. (REDH)

“I slipped in in safety and lay awake half the night in my joy at the thought of seeing you.” (COPP)

“Do you know, Watson,” said Holmes as we sat together in the gathering darkness, “I have really some scruples as to taking you to-night. (SPEC) I wouldn't hurt a hair of your bonny head for all that the world can give” (VALL)

“Good heavens, Holmes! Do you suppose that such a consideration weighs with me of an instant?” (DYIN)

“I seem to have knocked up against something hard,” (DANC) he showed that it was indeed as he said. (SECO) “You see it, Watson?” he yelled. “You see it?” (SPEC)

“It is peculiarly strong and stiff.” (SECO)

“I think that I must turn to you Watson, for something more solid.” (NOBL)

Then a queer thought came into my head and showed me where I could lay my hand on a weapon. (SIGN)

“What do you think of this, Watson?” he asked, tossing it. (NORW)

“Well, it is not the first we have shared, Holmes. I hope it may not be the last.” (3GAR)

For two hours we rambled about together, in silence for the most part, as befits two men who know each other intimately. (YELL)

“Excellent, Watson, excellent!” murmured my companion. (SILV)

“You wish me to come?”(STUD)

“Come over here now!” (STUD)

“Here you are, Holmes! Here it is!” (3GAR)

Finally he thrust the sharp point home, pressed down the tiny piston, and sank back. (SIGN) “And what do you think of it all, Watson?” asked Sherlock Holmes, leaning back in his chair. (SPEC)

“Wonderful!” I ejaculated. (STUD)

“I never get your limits, Watson,” said he. “There are unexplored possibilities about you.” (SUSS) The next moment he had staggered back to his bed, exhausted and panting after his one tremendous outflame of energy. (DYIN)

Monthly Meeting Minutes - 15th January 2019

The Shingle of Southsea Holmesian Society
Monthly Meeting Minutes

Date of Meeting: 15 January 2019

Location of Meeting:
The Sherloft, My House, Portsmouth, UK

Attendees:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller)

Apologies:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) apologised for being a bit jittery but he explained he had been spending too much time trying to make a Holmesian chronology and now he was broken inside.

The Toasts:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) proposed the following toast to someone or something. It was difficult to tell because he kept crying:

Watson was a forgiving man
He stuck things no other man can
When Holmes shot at their wall
He did not mind at all

I have no last line, sorry.

Motions:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) between screams, proposed that it should be illegal to make a Holmesian chronology.

Presentation:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) started trying to show some of the findings from his Holmesian chronology, but he ended up sort of laughing and crying at the same time before he curled up on the floor and tried to hide under the sofa.

Any Other Business:
I don't think so, somehow.

Monthly Meeting Minutes - 11th December 2018

The Shingle of Southsea Holmesian Society

Monthly Meeting Minutes

Date of Meeting: 11th December 2018

Location of Meeting:
The Sherloft, My House, Portsmouth, UK

Attendees:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller)

Apologies:
What else should "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) be? All apologies.

The Toasts:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) proposed the following toast to The Season of Forgiveness:

'Twas the night before Christmas, and on Baker Street

Sherlock sat down with a hot toddy treat.

His slipper was hung by the chimney with care,

So he filled up his pipe from his velvet-lined chair.

When out in the road there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter,

When what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.

Holmes, at my shoulder, looked on displeased

He opened a drawer, he reached in and seized

My service revolver, and checked it was loaded.

Then he leant out and five shots exploded.

Some reindeer escaped, but there still in the snow

Lay four of the reindeer and Santa brought low.

I remarked to my friend that I was confused

Why had poor St. Nick been so cruelly used?

“It’s a fact that such magic is highly illogical”

“It’s my duty to eliminate” said he “the impossible.”

Motions:

1. "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) proposed a society Christmas meal. "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) objected because he is an atheist. "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) told "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) to stop trying to bring religion into Christmas. "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) withdrew the motion.
2. "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) asked for his money back. "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) acting as treasurer pointed out no money had ever been paid to the society. "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) seconded everything in sight.

Presentation:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) gave the following presentation entitled A Study in A Study in Scarlet

A Study in A Study in Scarlet

I often find A Study in Scarlet to be somewhat maligned in the Holmesian community. It is frequently suggested that Holmes is not such a fully formed character in this tale. Obviously the story is recognised as important because it is the first story of the Canon, but I contend that it’s importance goes deeper. It is not a fault in the writing that either man seems less than whole in this story. They WERE less than whole and the writing reflects this.This is the story in which Holmes and Watson are both knocked off the courses they were on and became great rather than just good.

The effect of Holmes upon Watson is easier to see. Having been invalided out of the army, he was rapidly becoming one of the loungers and idlers of the Empire which are drawn to the cesspool that is London. He was a wastrel spending such money as he had, considerably more freely than he ought.  It could have been expected that the lazy and depressed doctor would follow his elder brother into drunkenness and an early grave. Until, that is, his adventures with Holmes renewed his interest in life. He began to write, to take pride in himself and to move himself back into respectable Victorian life. Such was the change that within seven years he would be settling down into general practice, having made a bride of one of Holmes’s clients.

The difference Watson made to Holmes is perhaps presented less obviously and yet it is a big difference. In those early days together in Baker Street Holmes is a far more sedentary detective. He resembles his elder brother Mycroft when he describes his unique role as a “consulting detective”:

“Here in London we have lots of Government detectives and lots of private ones. When these fellows are at fault they come to me, and I manage to put them on the right scent. They lay all the evidence before me, and I am generally able, by the help of my knowledge of the history of crime, to set them straight...”

“And these other people?”

“... They are all people who are in trouble about something, and want a little enlightening. I listen to their story, they listen to my comments, and then I pocket my fee.”

As yet, he is hardly a character who could be said to have had “adventures” (such as his first collection of short stories were titled). What then, brought about this change?

It will be recalled that early in their shared life, Watson was trying to guess what Holmes did for a living; what were his unique skills for and who were all these people visiting Holmes in their lodgings?
No doubt, the ever observant Holmes knew exactly what Watson was up to. Holmes would have been happy to talk about his occupation but was well aware that Watson would never be so rude as to just outright ask. It is my belief that Holmes’s peculiar behaviour on 4th March 1881 was designed to allow the above conversation to take place. While waiting for his breakfast, Watson read an article in a magazine which Holmes had marked out. The article turned out to be written by Holmes and outlined some of the methods by which he worked. I can see no reason for Holmes to mark out his own article unless he wanted someone else to read it. As he had no friends, the only person he could have meant to read it would be Watson. The reason, must have been to allow the question of Holmes’s profession to arise. Which it did.

However, far from the satisfying conclusion to Watson’s studies that Holmes predicted, Watson was rather incredulous. This annoyed Holmes, as can be seen in the rather tense discussion that followed, and that is when events were steered onto different rails.

There soon arrives a telegram from Tobias Gregson regarding the murder of Enoch Drebber at Lauriston Gardens. Watson assumes that Holmes will rush there at once to assist but Holmes tells him:

“I'm not sure about whether I shall go. I am the most incurably lazy devil that ever stood in shoe leather…”
There is a discussion over this reticence and he changes his mind. Why? No reason is given, but I believe he saw the opportunity to prove his skills to Watson. He could easily have solved the affair from his armchair just as with any other case, but he didn’t. He could have solved it without any one assisting him, but he didn’t. He tells Watson to get his hat and join him and the adventure begins.

And the change in Holmes begins too. The details of the adventure will either be known to you already or better discovered in the original text, but suffice it to say that it is far more active and enjoyable that Holmes has become used to. In the conclusion of the story he says:

“I would not have missed the investigation for anything. There has been no better case within my recollection. Simple as it was, there were several most instructive points about it.”

He may not have missed the case for anything, but I feel sure he would would have missed the case were it not for his desire to show Watson he was wrong.

From there they become a team and they both grow together. Watson as described above, but Holmes is a more easily missed way. In these early cases we see Holmes treating each case as a mere puzzle to solve. There is little consideration for the people involved in the cases. It only takes a small step back to look at the crime in A Study in Scarlet to make one question whether the murder was justified. Holmes never takes this step back. In cases such as A Scandal in Bohemia, we wonder whether Holmes was ever justified in taking the side of The King of Bohemia. In The Five Orange Pips he fails to protect his client from murderers and on learning this he comments “I feared as much. How was it done?” He had expected this might happen but did nothing to prevent it! Contrast this with the cases later on; in Abbey Grange he sides with the murderer and offers advise on getting away. In Charles Augustus Milverton, he becomes a criminal, and lets another murderer off. In His Last Bow he spends two difficult years actively preventing the plans of those who threaten his country. Two things seem to matter to him now; justice and adventure.

Holmes develops because of Watson just as much as Watson benefits from befriending Holmes. It is in Study in Scarlet that we see this subtle but dramatic conflict change both men’s lives for the better. It is this story which gives us the greatest element of the Canon; the interdependent friendship between Dr John H Watson and Mr Sherlock Holmes.

Any Other Business:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) gave us a brief synopsis of an essay he had written called Facial Expressions in Early Holmes. Which was more than enough for all of us.

Monthly Meeting Minutes - 22nd November 2018

The Shingle of Southsea Holmesian Society

Monthly Meeting Minutes

Date of Meeting: 22nd November 2018

Location of Meeting:
The Sherloft, My House, Portsmouth, UK

Attendees:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller)

Apologies:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) apologised for the screaming. It stopped after a while.

The Toasts:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) wrote the following poem in honour of The Great Hiatus

Sherlock Holmes went away

At the falls of Reichenbach.

Then just three years later on

Sherlock Holmes came right on back.

Motions:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) suggested we get some heating in the Sherloft. No one seconded the idea, so I have to stay cold.

Presentation:

"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) presented the following presentation:

The Game is Some Feet

While re-reading A Case of Identity recently I was drawn up short by the following comment on Holmes’ posture:

“Holmes stuck his feet up on the corner of the mantelpiece and, leaning back with his hands in his pockets, began talking…”

Previously I had always imagined this referred to a reclined detective, sat in a chair with his legs raised. But when I visualised this, the idea became preposturous. As the following highly detailed diagram shows, this could not possibly be a relaxing position:

My mind turned to possible alternatives. Could he be standing on the mantelpiece? Unlikely; he is a tall man and would have had his head uncomfortably pressed against the ceiling. Could he be a collector of the feet of different animals which he stowed upon the mantelpiece? Again, unlikely; I feel certain either Watson or Holmes would have mentioned this to the naturalist “Stapleton”. Perhaps he was referring to several measuring rulers each 12 inches in length? I can’t imagine why he would be handling these given that he had just finished conducting chemical experiments.

Eventually my mind turned to the details of another story; that of The Gloria Scott. It will be remembered that Holmes became friends with Victor Trevor after the latter’s bull terrier bit the former’s ankle. Clearly then, to spare Trevor’s blushes, Holmes did not tell the whole story. The dog did not merely freeze to his ankle, it savaged his ankle. With a fury that made it unstoppable, the dog continued in it’s frenzied attack until it had chewed it’s way right through all bone and flesh. How Trevor and Holmes must have sighed in relief that the embarrassing faux pas was over. But what’s this? No! Naughty doggy! Not the other ankle! The dog was not sated until it had chewed off both Holmes’ feet and happily devoured them.

Suddenly Holmes’ bizarre posture makes sense. He had removed his false wooden feet and placed them on the mantelpiece. Perhaps they had begun to chafe, prosthetics then not being what they are now. Clearly, he required comfort to tolerate Mr Windibank and his objectionable personality. A comfort that can only come from balancing on the stumps of one’s chewed up legs and threatening a man with a whip.

Any Other Business:

Nope.