This is the official website for The Shingle of Southsea Holmesian Society; a group dedicated to all things Holmesian, based in the Portsmouth and Southsea area in the UK.
The current membership is one person; Paul Thomas Miller. We have no plans to increase our membership.
I will use this blog to record the minutes of my monthly meetings with myself and any interesting works we produce together on my own.
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) apologised for leaving this so late in the month that he had nothing decent to present.
Toast:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) gave the following toast:
Dr Watson
Had a large
Throbbing
Bright red
Wound.
Somewhere.
Presentation:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) led a discussion about Arthur Conan Doyle's Portsmouth and Southsea:
Arthur Conan Doyle’s Portsmouth and Southsea
In 1882, Arthur Conan Doyle left Plymouth on a packet steamer and disembarked at a headland 150 miles along the coast. Here he decided to invent Portsmouth and Southsea as a sort of practical joke.
Doyle had spent a few months in Plymouth living with Dr George Turnavine Budd. He couldn’t believe such a hellscape existed in the real world. Low wages and high unemployment in the city had led to criminal tendencies and poor education among the masses. It was a boring, run-down miserable place to be.
Upon arriving at Portsea Island, Doyle set about making somewhere worse – just to see if it was possible. He would call this new city Portsmouth and, purely for the fun of confusing people, he would arbitrarily separate a chunk of the city and call it Southsea and tell everyone this was, in fact, a separate town, even though no one knew where the borders between them lay.
He populated it by using his secret Scotch doctor powers to breed a race of Unter-Mench. These homunculi would swagger about the new city spitting on everything. Just for the lols, he gave them the ability to speak, but not the ability to form real words. In order to make up for a lack of diction or anything to say, these wizened savages shouted their meaningless angry little noises at each other twenty-four hours a day. A tradition which continues to this day.
In order to establish it as one of Britain’s worst seaside resorts, Doyle spent five years removing all the sand from the beach and replacing it with uncomfortable shingle. This did nothing to dissuade the local vulgarites from descending upon it en masse any time the sun came out. Much to Doyle’s amusement, they would spend the whole of the summer crammed on the stony shoreline, packed shoulder to shoulder, where they would get drunk, smash beer bottles into the shingle, defecate upon everything and then lay there turning red in the sunburny goodness of the day.
In order to complete the experience, Doyle provided the locals with a sewage treatment works at one end of the beach which, even today, sees Southsea beach as one of the few places on the south coast where “bathing is not advised” and the water classification is “poor”.
At this point, Doyle thought the denizens of Shithole-On-Sea may require a hobby, so he gave them the highest density of pubs per square mile anywhere in the UK – 12 per square mile.
At this point Doyle felt he had gone too far, so he established a naval base large enough to make it a good target for the Germans in the two upcoming world wars. Sadly, Germany was rubbish at wars and completely failed to wipe Portsmouth off the map.
It’s not all bad news, though. In 1902 Doyle was knighted by King Eddy Seven for services to Pranks that Get Out of Hand. At which point Doyle decided to lend his services to the Boer War and ghosties.
Any Other Business:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) has no dignity left.
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) averted tragedy and then apologised.
Toast:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) gave the following toast:
Sherlock, oh, Sherlock.
Holmey Holmey Holmes.
I like the crumpet.
And you like the scones.
Presentation:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) performed the contents of Val Andrews 1984 chapbook "A Sherlock Holmes Balloon Modeling Act - To Illustrate Events and Items from The Canon - Includes Comedy Material, Gags and a Series of One-Liners".
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) did not bother reading the book properly first. Or rehearsing. Or having any previous knowledge of balloon modelling.
Thankfully this momentous event was recorded by Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon):
Any Other Business:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) thinks the latest issue of The Sherlock Holmes Journal is rather good.
And more to the point I don't have a hundred and ten quid to blow at the moment.
Presentation:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) led a discussion about the best type of Sherlock Holmes films:
Top Ten (Plus One) Sherlock Holmes Films Which Are Not Sherlock Holmes Films
There are plenty of Sherlock Holmes films which ARE Sherlock Holmes films to choose from, but where is the fun in that? No matter how good they are, eventually the saturation of Sherlock Holmes in a Sherlock Holmes film becomes overwhelming and we lose interest. Even in the greats such as Holmes and Watson (2018), The Crucifer of Blood (1991) or The Last Vampyre (1993) suffer from having a trifle too much Sherlock Holmes in them. Far preferable, then, is the Sherlock Holmes film which IS NOT a Sherlock Holmes film. Here are some of my favourites:
11. The Wrong Box (1966)
This amusing tale of a tontine is full of stars of other Holmesian films - Dudley Moore, Irene Handl, Michael Caine, John Mills, Peter Cook, Ralph Richardson and Thorley Walters to name just however many that was. Among all sorts of farcical behaviour concerning a box being wrong, Ralph Richardson happens to wear a deerstalker at one point. I give it a Holmesian score of 7%.
10. Professor Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine (1965)
Vincent Price is the titular mad scientist who is stealing bachelors' assets by making sexy robots in bikinis who seduce smutty men. It's a classic plot that probably has origins in Shakespeare, right down to the opera glasses which poke your eyes out. Fortunately, Agent Double-0-and-a-half [this, I understand, is a Very Good Joke] is on hand to save the world. At 43 minutes in, Igor - the undead assistant of Dr Goldfoot - cons his way into the headquarters of Secret Intelligence Command by dressing as Sherlock Holmes. Then they go back to the serious artform of women in gold bikinis jiggling about while various men make smutty comments. Classic Holmes, tastefully done. I give it a Holmesian score of 42%. Or six 7-per-cents.
9. Midnight Shadow (1939)
What should have been remarkable - a completely black produced film in 1939 America (when, believe it or not, America was even more racist) - is thoroughly boring. A wealthy couple's guest gets all killed up by some other bloke. Then some detectives fanny about. The important thing is that after 42 minutes one of the detectives dresses as Sherlock Holmes. I give it a Holmesian score of 49%.
8. The House in Nightmare Park (1973)
Frankie Howerd plays an actor in 1907 who gets embroiled in a load of creepy nonsense at an isolated country house. The film is co-written and produced by Terry Nation - the bloke who created the Daleks for Dr Who. There's a lot of punning, innuendo and general twatting about. And when some fella blacks up to do a musical number, he gets murdered to death. Which is nice. Then after an hour, Howerd dresses up as Holmes and goes for a walk in the fog. I don't think he's meant to be Holmes. But you can't argue with a deerstalker and Inverness cloak. I give it a Holmesian score of 56%.
7. The Best House in London (1969)
Brothel fun for all the family. And there is an apparently amusing joke near the end where Holmes makes some incorrect deductions about the owner of a comb and then turns out not to be Holmes after all. Not-Sherlock is played by Peter Jeffrey - who would go on to play Mycroft in Hands of a Murderer. And Thorley Walters appears in his second of four screen portrayals of Dr Watson. Although he isn't really Watson. I give it a Holmesian score of 63%.
6. Brian and Charles (2022)
The platonic love of a man for his washing-machine-based-robot is a beautiful thing. It is even more beautiful when, at 48 minutes into a film, the washing-machine-based-robot dresses up as Sherlock Holmes. I give it a Holmesian score of 70%.
5. Nine Girls (1944)
Nine Girls is the heart-warming tale of a nine sorority girls who go sleuthing when one of them gets killed to bits. Everyone is a suspect because Paula - the corpse - was so thoroughly murderable. The main thing, of course, is that they are all in massive swim suits or pyjamas whenever possible, making this 1944's equivalent of hardcore porn. There isn't a single Sherlockian moment in the whole thing. But they did pose in deerstalkers in one publicity photo for the film. I give it a Holmesian score of 77%.
4. Murder By Death (1976)
What's better than a Holmesian cameo? A Holmesian cameo in the post-credits scene. What's better than a Holmesian cameo in the post-credits scene? A Holmesian cameo in the post-credits scene which got edited out of the final cut. Murder By Death features a whole host of famous detective parodies: a Charlie Chan, a Hercule Poirot, a Miss Marple and Columbo as Peter Falk as Humphrey Bogart as Sam Spade as Columbo. They all attend a dinner at a mysterious mansion. People get killed. Jokes are made. Stuff happens. Blah blah. Everything is solved and everyone goes home. After the credits Holmes was supposed to arrive late and this was meant to be funny. But that got edited out. I give it a Holmesian score of 84%.
3. League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)
The League of Gentlemen is, of course, one of the greatest films ever made. It was described by one imaginary film critic as the best comic book adaptation that ever was, is or will be made. It has repeatedly been hailed as Sean Connery's second best film (eclipsed only by his portrayal of Sir August de Wynter in the 1998 movie "The Avengers"). However, the sheer splendour of the film means many viewers miss the Holmesian connection - Richard Roxburgh plays the enigmatic "M". Towards the end of the film we find out that "M" is Moriarty - the same Moriarty who "died" at Reichenbach Falls. From this, we can infer the existence of a Sherlock Holmes somewhere in the universe of the film. I give it a Holmesian score of 91%.
2. Shanghai Knights (2003)
This accurate biopic of Arthur Conan Doyle would not be complete without the scene in which The Literary Agent first meets Holmes and Watson, in the form of Owen Wilson and Jackie Chan. Were it not for this film, many people would be completely unaware that Doyle was an effeminate English police constable. I give it a Holmesian score of 98%.
1. Hundreds of Beavers (2022)
The central story of this documentary is about some bloke doing some stuff in settler times. But the secondary story is that Holmes Beaver and Watson Beaver keep finding evidence of horrific crimes against beavers, they draw their conclusions and they present their findings to the beaver court. Arthur Conan Doyle couldn't have done it better. And, it is to be noted, he didn't. I give it a Holmesian score of 105%. Or fifteen 7-per-cents.
Any Other Business:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) has finally given in on pastiches. Everyone said it would happen. "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) always said it wouldn't. But I'm afraid "The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) was wrong. He was ground down by the tide of badly edited effluent poured out by a company who are ripping off both the Holmesian consumers and the Holmesian writers.
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) is still waiting.
Toast:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) gave the following toast, which made very little sense because it was put together in a hurry:
My dear, Watson,
Are you awake?
Rise up, now,
'Cos it is daybreak!
Upset and betrayal prevail -
No time to quail and wail!
Try some of this lovely cheesecake.
Presentation:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) presented the following piece about ghosts and Sherlock Holmes:
The Ghost Adventures of Sherlock Holmes
Season 1, Episode 8: The Haunting at Stoke Moran
Last night, while asleep, I caught a new TV show that I thought may have been of interest to other Holmesians. I've done my best to write it up exactly how I dreamt it:
CONTINUITY ANNOUNCER: And now, we join paranormal investigators Sherlock Holmes and Dr John H. Watson as they investigate ghostly goings on at the Roylott family home...
[HOLMES and WATSON are outside Stoke Moran, the ancestral home of the Roylotts]
HOLMES [to camera]: There are things in this world that we will never fully understand.
WATSON [in a peculiar voice]: Understand.
HOLMES: We want answers. When you have eliminated the improbable, whatever remains, no matter how impossible, must be... ghosts...
[Roll opening titles]
[Cut to HOLMES and WATSON who are being driven through country roads in a horse and trap]
WATSON: We're on our way to the historic stately home of Stoke Moran in Surrey, En-ger-land to investigate strange noises reportedly heard in the night and an apparent curse on the women of the Roylott family.
HOLMES: I'm already getting goosebumps. This place goes all the way back to Saxon times. Just imagine the energy that will have built up here over however much time that is.
WATSON: I know! I'm American, so I don't understand any actual history, but that sounds like it's a really long time ago. Maybe even more than 50 years.
HOLMES: I didn't know anything could be that old!
WATSON: So what sort of phenomenon have been reported there?
[Cut to photo of HELEN Stoner and Julia Stoner]
HOLMES [Voice over]: Ever since their mother died eight years ago, twins, Helen and Julia Stoner were plagued with a feeling of dread and unease in their home. They claim to have been able to smell cigar smoke in closed off rooms. They have heard whistling in the night. And perhaps worst of all, Julia was mysteriously killed in a locked room - presumably by a ghost.
[Cut to HOLMES and WATSON stood outside Stoke Moran house looking deadly serious, like they are about to go into an actual battle or something that matters]
HOLMES: We're finally here at what might be one of the most active paranormal sites in En-ger-land. We looked it up and this house actually dates back over 800 years. That's almost 8 centuries.
WATSON: WOW! I'd imagine it is possible that in that much time, some things have happened in this house.
HOLMES: Yes, we've been able to confirm that at least one person has died in this building.
WATSON [animatedly]: WOW! For some reason, I am amazed by this information! Imagine the energy that will have accumulated within these walls!
HOLMES: Yes, I'd imagine that these walls are full of the non-descript "energy" we keep on talking about as if it meant something.
[Cut to a hallway inside Stoke Moran where HOLMES and WATSON are speaking with HELEN]
HOLMES: So, Helen, what's the history of this building? Was it built on ground sacred to Native En-ger-lish Indians?
HELEN: No. There is no such thing as a Native En-ger-lish Indian.
HOLMES: Oh my God! So they've been wiped out! That's genocide!
WATSON: No wonder their spirits are so angry.
HELEN: But...
HOLMES: And from here on out, we're going to treat that theory as fact.
[Cut to HELEN's bedroom, where HOLMES and WATSON are speaking with HELEN]
HOLMES: What sort of phenomenon have you encountered?
HELEN: This used to be my sisters room. Ever since our mother died eight years ago, this building seems to have been filled with a sense of dread and horror.
WATSON: I feel that too. Like, in the next bedroom over, I definitely sensed a chill. There was a definite cold spot in there.
HELEN: The one where workmen have taken down part of the outside wall?
WATSON: Yes. And as you know, cold spots can often indicate a paranormal presence.
HOLMES: That's crazy! We've only been here a short while and we're already finding prove of supernatural forces at work in this building. Tell us about your sister's experiences in this room.
HELEN: She used to say that she heard strange noises in the night. Low whistling noises, and hisses. And she could smell cigar smoke in here although she never smoked.
HOLMES: That's insane! Did she find any logical explanation?
HELEN: No, she died.
WATSON: Do you know how she died?
HELEN: No. She was locked inside her room. There was no way in or out. No signs of foul play were found. She was perfectly healthy and she just [Helen begins to well up and sob]… died.
[HOLMES and WATSON seem delighted by this news]
WATSON: Ha ha ha! My god! That's crazy!
HOLMES: That's brilliant! What more proof could there be that this is definitely a spectre with a grudge. Have you sensed anything since you moved into this room?
HELEN: [still visibly upset] I have encountered the very same things. When the lights go out I hear rustling and hissing in the darkness. There is a low whistling around three in the morning every night. And I smell cigar smoke even tho…
WATSON: [Looking and pointing out of the window] A SHADOW MAN!
[camera shakily pans to window capturing nothing but blur and glare]
HOLMES: WHAT? WHERE? OH MY GOD?
WATSON: I saw a shadow man on the lawn, by the trees!
HOLMES: This is too much!
WATSON: A little squat shadow man, like a little demon...
HELEN: Oh, that will be my step-father's baboo...
HOLMES: A DEMON!
WATSON: A shadow demon!
[HOLMES starts wheezing and groaning and generally hamming it up]
WATSON: Oh my God! He's possessed we need to get him out of here.
[WATSON begins helping HOLMES get out of the building]
[Cut to exterior of building again. HELEN, HOLMES and WATSON.]
HOLMES: [Out of breath, to camera] That was crazy. The evil spirits were trying to enter me. There's clearly a lot of activity in that house. A lot of energy. Maybe even a vortex or a portal. What do you think, Helen?
HELEN: I'm terrified. I'm scared I will die too.
WATSON: Well, don't worry. We're here now. I'm going to go back in, get some baseline readings - whatever that means - and prepare for a vigil in your room tonight.
[Cut to HELEN's room. Night vision. HOLMES is sat on bed. WATSON is sat on a chair]
HOLMES: It's 2AM and we've been sitting here in the pitch black for two hours now. We've already had some interesting evidence.
WATSON: Yes, my legs have started to ache, which must be due to a poltergeist.
HOLMES: And, since we blew the candles out, I can't see anything, which is due to the energy in the vortex portals.
[there is a metallic creak, akin to the sort of noise an old vent between rooms being opened might make]
HOLMES: Did you hear that?!
WATSON: I did! It was a definite voice!
HOLMES: Yes! It was like an old lady saying "Get out!"
[Cut to replay of the footage from when the noise was heard: a metallic creak, akin to the sort of noise an old vent between rooms being opened might make. Probably repeated several times at different speeds. It is visualised as a waveform on screen with the subtitle "Get out!"]
WATSON: Yes! It was definitely a native En-ger-lish Indian woman saying "Get out"!
[There is a hiss and a whistle]
HOLMES: AAaaarrrgh! I've pissed my knickers.
WATSON: I've shat mine! Let's get out of here!
[They flee the building, leaving the camera behind]
[The night vision on the camera captures a snake slithering into the next room through an air vent. A scream is heard from the next room.}
[Roll end credits]
Any Other Business:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) has decided he is the King of the World. Hail Paul Thomas Miller! Praise his generous waistline and bountiful chins!
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) is still waiting.
Toast:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) gave the following toast:
The cheetah's in the bushes
The gibbon's on the lawn
The swamp adder is in the safe
Your love will keep me warm
Touch me, Watson, touch me
Old Roylott is distracted
The bed is bolted to the floor
(This last line is redacted).
Or, as a video you can see it here:
Presentation:
Paul Thomas Miller (The Entire Canon) presented the following paper about pubs:
The Alpha Inn
By Paul Thomas Miller
As it is the most Christmassy day of the year, I decided to spend 1st March 2025 in search of the most Christmassy pub in The Canon - The Alpha Inn. Having gone through all of my books on Canonical locations, I found a total of four contenders.
The first is The Museum Tavern. William S Baring-Gould’s Annotated Sherlock Holmes (1967) suggests that this was first proposed by Christopher Morley, although no citation is given. Since then, it has appeared in many other books - as a statement of fact -that this is correct.
The second is The Plough which, Baring-Gould says, was Gavin Brend’s counter proposal to Morley’s claim.
In On the Scent (1984), Arthur M. Axelrad mentioned both of these, but also suggested a third contender – The Old Crown Public House. His reasoning seems to be that other people have suggested this pub, although he gives no indication who.
Finally, there is my own suggestion which can be found in my book Finding Sherlock Holmes (2023) – The Bloomsbury Tavern.
These four pubs are all handily close to each other and visiting them in the order stated allowed me to meander my way from the museum towards Tottenham Court Road tube station. If I simply walked past each pub, this route would have taken me nine minutes – a perfect stroll. I did not simply walk past each pub, though, so it took me a whole lovely afternoon.
The first thing to do with each pub is check that it existed at the time of the BLUE. Chronologists have placed BLUE as early as 1887 (William S. Baring-Gould) and as late as 1890 (Jay Finley Christ). We should, then, only consider pubs which existed around 1887-1890.
Then we need to check that the contenders match the description in The Canon of The Alpha Inn. From Henry Baker, we get the following:
“There are a few of us who frequent the Alpha Inn, near the Museum--we are to be found in the Museum itself during the day, you understand. This year our good host, Windigate by name, instituted a goose club, by which, on consideration of some few pence every week, we were each to receive a bird at Christmas.”
From this we can see that the pub must be near to the British Museum, where Henry works, and that it should have been under the ownership of a Mr Windigate around the time of this case.
Next, we get a description of the route Holmes and Watson took to the Inn from Baker Street:
“Our footfalls rang out crisply and loudly as we swung through the doctors' quarter, Wimpole Street, Harley Street, and so through Wigmore Street into Oxford Street. In a quarter of an hour we were in Bloomsbury at the Alpha Inn, which is a small public-house at the corner of one of the streets which runs down into Holborn. Holmes pushed open the door of the private bar and ordered two glasses of beer from the ruddy-faced, white-aproned landlord.”
Watson is not clear whether he means that it took them quarter of an hour from Baker Street or Oxford Street to get to the pub. With the average walking speed of a human being 3 miles per hour, and the journey taking them just fifteen minutes, the walking route to this pub ought to be less than a mile from wherever Watson is starting his timer. Baker Street is about 2 miles from the Museum, so is the unlikely option. It is more likely that he refers to the time from Oxford Street – about two-thirds of a mile from the Museum. We are, then, looking for a pub roughly 0.75 miles from the junction of Oxford Street and Regent Street.
There is also a suggestion here that the pub had at least two entrances – one to the public bar and one to the private bar.
The pub should also be in Bloomsbury, on a corner and on a street which leads to Holborn.
Here are my findings:
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA
As stated above, this identification seems to be attributed to Christopher Morley. In Sherlock Holmes London Walks #3: Trafalgar Square to Euston (1993), Antony J Richards suggests that this pub was, at one time, actually called The Alpha Inn, but I can find no supporting evidence for this claim. I suspect he was good-naturedly “playing the game”.
Age of Pub: Correct.
This pub has existed on the same spot since 1723, but the current building only dates back to 1855. It was originally named The Dog and Duck but changed its name to The Museum Tavern in 1759.
Location: Incorrect.
It is situated on a corner in Bloomsbury, but as it is set well back from both New Oxford Street and Southampton Row, it cannot be said to be on “one of the streets which runs down into Holborn”. It is a seventeen-minute walk from the junction of Oxford Street and Regent Street.
The aspects of The Museum Tavern which seem to recommend it are that it is the closest pub to the British Museum, and it is on a corner. Indeed, the Museum Tavern is directly opposite the British Museum. However, I would suggest that this proximity to the Museum counts against it.
Consider Baker’s first words on the subject: “There are a few of us who frequent the Alpha Inn, near the Museum--we are to be found in the Museum itself during the day, you understand.” That quick follow-up about being in the Museum during the day comes across as rather defensive, doesn’t it? When we consider that Holmes had already deduced Henry Baker was a slave to drink, that defensive follow-up almost seems like an admission of guilt.
If we might, then, assume that occasionally Baker and his chums would slip out of work for an illicit pint or two, would we really expect him to frequent a pub that is in direct view of the Museum? It would only be a matter of time before they were caught out. To my mind, the pub’s proximity to the Museum counts against it, rather than for.
Landlord Name: Incorrect.
At the time of the case, The Museum Tavern was run by Charles John Coombs.
Private Bar: Correct.
The Museum Tavern definitely did have a private and public bar system once. You can still see the old doors are marked “Saloon Bar” and “Private Bar”.
Goose Club: Incorrect.
While it is possible the practice has ceased in the last 125 years, the bemused bartender informed me that they have no idea what a goose club is, let alone operate one today.
Other notes:
I tried the Museum Tavern Ale here. It was easily the best beer I had that day. However, the toilets were the most difficult to locate of all four pubs I visited.
The Plough, 27 Museum St, London WC1A 1LH
Gavin Brend’s main reason for originally suggesting this pub was an observation that The Plough is a common name for the constellation Ursa Major. He also noted that the brightest star in this constellation is called Alpha. His suggestion is that Watson took inspiration from this when creating the fake name of “The Alpha Inn”. It is worth noting, though, that every constellation’s brightest star is designated “alpha”, its second brightest is “beta”, and so forth. There is nothing special about The Plough having an alpha star. Nevertheless, the name of a constellation may well have brought the naming of stars to Watson’s mind.
Age of Pub: Correct.
This pub has been at the same address since 1855 under the same name.
Location: Incorrect.
It is situated on a corner in Bloomsbury, but, as it is in the middle of a back street, it cannot be said to be on “one of the streets which runs down into Holborn”. It is an eighteen-minute walk from the junction of Oxford Street and Regent Street.
Landlord Name: Incorrect.
At the time of the case it was run by Thomas John Taylor.
Private Bar: Likely Correct.
There were two separate entrances to The Plough which did suggest a private/public bar set up in the past. This setup is a rare thing these days, so it is not surprising to see it transformed, like most pubs, into one larger public bar today.
Goose Club: Incorrect.
While it is possible the practice has ceased in the last 125 years, the bemused bartender informed me that they have no idea what a goose club is, let alone operate one today.
Other Notes:
I had a Green King IPA here. It was alright. Not amazing though. But the toilets were very easy to find.
The Old Crown Public House, 33 New Oxford St, London WC1A 1BH
It is unclear why this pub was nominated as a potential Alpha Inn. No doubt, the explanation exists somewhere, but I was unable to locate it.
Age of Pub: Correct.
The Old Crown was rebuilt on this spot in 1850. It seems that there has been a pub on this spot since 1751.
Location: Correct.
It is situated on a corner in Bloomsbury on “one of the streets which runs down into Holborn” – New Oxford Street. It is an eighteen-minute walk from the junction of Oxford Street and Regent Street.
Landlord Name: Incorrect.
At the time of the case it was run by William Chapman.
Private Bar: Incorrect.
While it did once have two entrances, The Old Crown is (and was) a tiny pub. It is difficult to imagine it ever having had a two bar setup.
Goose Club: Incorrect.
While it is possible the practice has ceased in the last 125 years, the bemused bartender informed me that they have no idea what a goose club is, let alone operate one today.
Other notes:
I had a Rivertown IPA here. It was horrible. And the toilets, while easy to find, were in a horrible state.
When I set out on this journey, I was expecting to rule in favour of The Old Crown being the correct Alpha Inn. But having visited it, it just seems too small and too horrible to be a genuine contender. Also, they didn’t take cash, so it is difficult to imagine how Holmes would have paid in a pre-chip-and-pin era.
The Bloomsbury Tavern, 236 Shaftesbury Avenue, Holborn, WC2H 8EG
I selected The Bloomsbury Tavern as the Alpha Inn when I was writing Finding Sherlock Holmes largely because the route Holmes and Watson took from Baker Street to the pub, combined with the need to be on road leading to Holborn. The only reason I opted for this one over The Old Crown, was that it was slightly closer to Oxford Street and was, therefore, a tiny bit closer to the fifteen-minute walk Watson described.
Age of Pub: Correct.
The pub has been here since 1856, although Holmes and Watson would have known it as The Black Lion up until 1905, when it was renamed The Bloomsbury Tavern.
Location: The Correctest.
It is situated on a corner in Bloomsbury on “one of the streets which runs down into Holborn” – New Oxford Street. It is a seventeen-minute walk from the junction of Oxford Street and Regent Street.
Landlord Name: Incorrect.
At the time of the case, it was run by Jason Naish.
Private Bar: Probably Correct.
The Bloomsbury does have several entrances (although they are not all in use today) and it is easy to imagine how the bar area may once have been divided into private and public areas.
Goose Club: Incorrect.
While it is possible the practice has ceased in the last 125 years, the bemused bartender informed me that they have no idea what a goose club is, let alone operate one today.
Other notes:
I had a Shepherd’s Neame Master Brew here, which was easily my second favourite beer of the day. I did not use the toilets here, but I could easily see where they were located.
So where does this leave us in terms of identifying The Alpha Inn.
All four pubs qualify in age, we can ignore this evidence in our selection.
There does not seem to be any clue in the landlord names of any of the four pubs – none of them resemble or are reminiscent of “Windigate”. This isn’t terribly surprising - Watson changed the name of the pub in his account, so he probably changed the name of the landlord too.
Goose clubs seem to have been abandoned in this area of London, so we can also discount this evidence.
All four pubs are near enough to a fifteen minute walk from Oxford Street to make quibbling about the differences unworthwhile.
And all four pubs are on corners, as per the text.
The main evidence available to make our choice, then, is that of location.
The Museum Tavern, despite its frequent selection by Holmesians, most definitely cannot be The Alpha Inn. It is nowhere close to being on “one of the streets which runs down into Holborn”. Nor would Henry Baker have described it as “near” the Museum. He’d have described it as “right bang bloody opposite and practically abutting” the Museum.
The Plough, while more likely than The Museum Tavern, is also not on a street to Holborn.
So, only two of the pubs are in the correct location - The Old Crown and The Bloomsbury Tavern.
The Old Crown may be ruled out by simply being far too small to house either a two bar system or enough clients and storage to support a 24 member goose club. It is also horrible.
It pains me to seem so inflexible, then, but I believe my selection of The Bloomsbury Tavern (née The Black Lion) in Finding Sherlock is the best of the four choices. And it was the nicest one to be in too, which is a bonus.
Any Other Business:
"The Entire Canon" (Paul Thomas Miller) thought people might like a list of all the references to The Alpha Inn's real identity he found when researching this presentation. So here it is:
Finding Sherlock Holmes by Paul Thomas Miller, Belanger Books, 2023
The Bloomsbury Tavern, 236 Shaftesbury Avenue, Holborn, WC2H 8EG - Located by following the route Watson and Holmes took to it from Baker Street.
Sherlock Holmes London Walks, #3, Trafalgar Square to Euston by Antony J Richards, Irregular Special Railway Company, 1993
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - Identified as being previously named “The Alpha Inn” (I can find no evidence that this is true) and being near the Museum.
Sherlock Holmes in London, Charles Viney, Phoebe Phillips Editions, 1989
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - No explanation given. But it does include a photograph of The Museum Tavern in 1890.
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - No explanation given
On the Scent, Arthur M AxelRad, The Bullpup Press, 1984
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - Other people have suggested it.
The Plough, 27 Museum St, London WC1A 1LH - Other people have suggested it.
The Old Crown Public House, 33 New Oxford St, London WC1A 1BH - Other people have suggested it.
Sherlock’s London Today, Gunnar E Sundin, Sherlock’s Bookshop, 1985
The Plough, 27 Museum St, London WC1A 1LH - No reason given
The London of Sherlock Holmes, Thomas Bruce Wheeler, MX “Publishing”, 2011
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - It’s near the Museum.
For The Sake of the Game, David L Hammer, Gasogene Press, 1986
(Reprinted in A Deep Game: The Travelers’ Companion to The London of Sherlock Holmes, David L Hammer, Gasogene Books, 2002)
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - Corner location near the museum.
The Plough, 27 Museum St, London WC1A 1LH - Corner location near the museum. Hammer favours this one for the internal ambience.
Sherlock Holmes’s London, Rose Shepherd, Cico Books, 2015
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - Prime contender amongst Sherlockians
The Oxford Sherlock Holmes: The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, ACD (Edited by Richard Lancing Green), Oxford University Press, 1993
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - Near the museum.
The Plough, 27 Museum St, London WC1A 1LH - Near the museum. Green also notes that the brightest star in the constellation The Plough is called Alpha.
The Annotated Sherlock Holmes, William S Baring Gould, Clarkson N Potter Inc, 1967
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA - Christopher Morley claimed it.
The Plough, 27 Museum St, London WC1A 1LH - Gavin Brend claimed it to be, noting the “alpha” connection with constellations.
The New Annoted Sherlock Holmes, Leslie S Klinger,
The Museum Tavern, 49 Great Russell Street, WC1B 3BA
Christopher Morley claimed it.
The Plough, 27 Museum St, London WC1A 1LH
Some Holmesians have claimed it to be, noting the “alpha” connection with constellations.
- A note in the Baker Street Journal for October 1957 records that The Sherlock Holmes Society of London visited an Inn in Museum Street on 18th June 1957 which they considered to be The Alpha Inn. Presumably this was The Museum Tavern.
- In “The Empty House-Warming Weekend: London, 15-16 January, 1994 By Francine And Wayne Swift” from BSJ March 1994, there is a report thatat The Museum Tavern “Heather Owen sat on the bar and proved once and for all that this is the “Alpha Inn.””
